Five Things In My Carry-on That Will Help Me Carry On

So, this is a post I've been carrying around for five months.

I was given the topic, "Carry on, carry on, carry on!" to speak on in church a week before I came home. I imagine Bishop Hood wanted me to talk about the song, but I was sneaky and just a little creative. In this world where we are still in a war of words and tumult of opinions, I need all the help I can get if I want to keep on the straight and narrow. These are five things that we can each carry around, if need be.

1. My Pedigree Chart

"Those Girls are on Bikes in Dresses!"

Do you ever feel so self conscious and think that everyone thinks you're weird? As a Mormon, you may have experienced this as lots of people think it's funny that we don't drink tea or coffee, wear sleeveless shirts, watch Rated-R movies, or go out to lunch after church. Not to worry, I can help!*

Recently, my companion and I, as well as all other missionaries in my mission, have been instructed to purchase bicycles. And then use them. For Elders, this is all well and good. Everyone is already used to seeing the boys on bikes, dressed in white shirts and ties. What they are not used to seeing is this:

Skirts; they are not conducive to bike riding.

While we may look a tiny bit silly, I have not felt all that weird putting on a helmet and biking around town. I know for a fact that my lovely companion sure has. Sure, we get the occasional snickers and double takes and, "Those girls are on bikes in dresses!" remarks, but I have yet to be embarrassed. Of course, I have not turfed it yet while riding and made a complete fool out of myself. Currently, I am a partial fool. And I'm fine with that.

See, three years ago, I learned a great lesson about reducing your embarrassment. I had found myself able to get two helium filled balloons for free. So, I decided the best use of them would be to carry them around the University of Utah campus while I went to my normal class schedule from 9 to 5 the day before my 22nd birthday. They were lilac and teal and I loved them. Most mature adults don't carry around balloons; more often than not, I sold colorful balloons to small children. Naturally, I should have been shrinking into a ball of embarrassment.

I started my day by stopping at the Union Services Desk and picking up my balloons from my dear friend Kim. Then I took them to American Literature, each of my succeeding classes, and the lunchroom in the Marriott Library. Now while I fully expected many people to ask me, "Why do you have those balloons?" no one actually did until I was standing around in the lunchroom waiting for my pizza to cook. And when I said, "My birthday's tomorrow," he didn't really care. 

I think what made everyone around me act normal was the fact that I acted like it is a completely normal thing to have two balloons tied to your wrist. Maybe they did think I was weird, but I didn't feel like they did.

We can do the same thing in most any other situation. Our confidence is what gives us strength, and if we, "Cast not away therefore [our] confidence, which hath great recompense of reward," we'll be fine. (Hebrews 10:35) In fact, we'll see great results, especially if we keep our confidence in The Lord.

Why does the Lord want to be confident? Because the other option is to be afraid.

Don't do that.

Remember, if you get the high-float, they say the balloons will last longer, but you can't take them outside. That's no fun.

*In the case of legitimate Social Phobia or Anxiety, please see you nearest licensed therapist. LDS Family Services has some good ones.

Nobody Cares How Much You Know...

For three years in High School, I participated in the Debate Team. I loved it. Does that mean I argued with bunches of people? No, I'm terrible at it. I did Impromptu speeches, Orations, Storytelling, and Prose/Poetry readings. I basically talked a lot when I went to tournaments. I chickened out of actually debating with anyone, and I admired my teammates who could. I had a lot of fun and learned a lot about public speaking.

I may be biased because I spent three years surrounded by arguments, but I believe arguing is good for you.

Now, I know the word Argument has negative connotations. In order to keep everyone happy, many people avoid arguments and disagreements. I know from experience that arguments, if you understand what they are, can leave participants feeling satisfied, educated, and enlightened.

So, if you want to talk to someone about your two differing opinions, you have three options.

Argument

In an argument, both parties present their opinions and their reasoning for believing it and evidence for it. They also have an opportunity to ask critical questions about their opponent's stance and evidence, as well as time to defend themselves and respond to questions. Both parties have to come into an argument knowing the terms and conditions of this discussion, and end it without holding grudges or wanting to have the last say.

Fight

A fight is very different from an argument. A fight often happens unexpectedly or occurs when an argument's rules are violated. The tone and atmosphere is dark, negative, angry, defensive, and rushed. Instead of presenting evidence or asking fact based questions, participants attack the other side, the opponent's character, and the opponent's intelligence. It's about winning at all costs, even if that means they attack something that isn't the topic up for debate.

See. It's a table. (Visual pun!)

Discussion

But there is a third option. In a discussion, participants bring their opinions and ideas to the table, present them in a calm and fair atmosphere, and occasionally swallow their need to be right in order to listen to the other. Elder Zwick spoke about these kinds of communications. "The writer of Proverbs counsels, "A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger" (Proverbs 15:1). A "soft answer" consists of a reasoned response--disciplined words from a humble heart. It does not mean we never speak directly or that we compromise doctrinal truth. Words that may be firm in information can be soft in spirit."

My rule of thumb is religions are discussed, politicians have arguments, and the internet is for fights and flame wars. And blogs.

It is okay to have an argument, but it is a skill to hold yourself back while simultaneously defending your position. Jeffrey R. Holland said, "Defend your beliefs with courtesy and with compassion, but
defend them." We should not be afraid to bring up our beliefs in discussions and conversations because we have the skills and knowledge to present and convince others of them. We also have the Spirit on our side to help us keep an atmosphere of peace and love for others. More than anything, have charity for those you speak to, no matter who they are; no one will care how much you know if they don't know how much you care.

For further tips on discussing your beliefs, read this article from The New Era.

Remember: Sometimes there is a place for silence. Even Jesus held His tongue when He knew there was no purpose in speaking.

What is a Rameumptom? And Where Can I Get One?

I think we got ours from Shopko. Or Apostates-R-Us, I can't remember.

Alma the Younger went on a mission to a group of Nephites that had rejected the Church of Jesus Christ and dissented from the Nephites. They had followed the teachings of an anti-Christ called Korihor, and now worshiped an incorrect form of Deity due to their misunderstanding of the nature of God.

These people, the Zoramites, worshiped God once a week in their synagogues by standing on a pedestal in the center, raising their hands towards heaven, and 'praying' as loudly as they could,

"Holy, holy God; we believe that thou art God, and we believe that thou art holy, and that thou wast a spirit, and that thou art a spirit, and that thou wilt be a spirit forever. Holy God, we believe that thou hast separated us from our brethren; and we do not believe in the tradition of our brethren, which was handed down to them by the childishness of their fathers; but we believe that thou hast elected us to be thy holy children; and also thou hast made it known unto us that there shall be no Christ. But thou art the same yesterday, today, and forever; and thou hast elected us that we shall be saved, whilst all around us are elected to be cast by thy wrath down to hell; for the which holiness, O God, we thank thee; and we also thank thee that thou hast elected us, that we may not be led away after the foolish traditions of our brethren, which doth bind them down to a belief of Christ, which doth lead their hearts to wander far from thee, our God. And again we thank thee, O God, that we are a chosen and a holy people. Amen." Alma 31:15-18

They then went home and didn't think about God the rest of the week. They called this Holy Stand a Rameumptom.

An Illustration of How Not to Pray

The example of the Zoramites teaches us things not to do. First, don't pray with vain repetitions. I think vain has two meanings here. When we're vain, we think only of ourselves, and so our prayers are only about us. Vain can also be pointless or futile.  You know how when you say a word several times over, it stops making sense and loses it's meaning? Sometimes we do the same thing, praying exactly same prayer over and over again because we're stuck in a routine.

Second, our religion needs to be a part of our lives, not a once-every-seven-days thing. I bet if the Zoramites, with their incorrect notions of God and Christ, had remembered God in their day-to-day lives, they wouldn't have been quite so wicked. How blessed are we to have a fullness of the truth. Imagine how much closer to God you could be just by reading your scriptures every day and praying sincerely each morning and night.

See, if you lean on something, your
legs don't fall asleep.

Speaking of family prayer.... My family did have a Rameumptom. My Dad's cushioned rocking chair came with an ottoman. Mom would lean on it during our family prayer so her legs wouldn't go numb. Sometimes one of us kids would steal it instead if she didn't get it fast enough. We used the Rameumptom daily, tried our best not to use vain repetitions, and I'm pretty sure if we tried to stand on it and raise our arms towards heaven, we'd fall off and crack our heads open. So I'm not sure why we called it that.

The point is: Pray Sincerely. It's good for you.

What about the man in China? Temples and Family History

Pictured: A man in China

In order to enter the Kingdom of God, you have to have faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement, repent, be baptized by someone holding Priesthood Authority, receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, and endure to the end. That's all fine and dandy if you live in a nation with religious freedom and missionaries that are allowed to knock on your door. But what if you're a poor man in rural China who lived a good life, but died without ever finding out that Jesus Christ exists? Is he damned for eternity? Nope!

In the afterlife, we'll either go to a spirit paradise or spirit prison, which is a lot like a spirit school. Jesus Christ opened the way for missionary work to go on in the spirit world so we can learn about Him even after we've died. So if this man in China would have accepted Christ while he was alive, he can accept Christ after he has died. God is just and fair and gives this opportunity to all His children, no matter where they live.

Hamilton New Zealand Temple

However, accepting Christ isn't enough. We have to be baptized and make other covenants in the temple, and these can only be done while we're alive and have a body. That's where we come in. At the temple, we perform saving ordinances for and in behalf of our deceased ancestors. They still have the same personality and their agency to accept or reject the work we've done for them. We can't force anyone, alive or dead, to be a Mormon or a member of Jesus Christ's church. But it's important that they at least have that option.

This is why it's so important to do our Family History. You have ancestors waiting to get their temple work done, and they're eager for it to be done before the Millennium -- tomorrow if possible.Get started finding your ancestors so their temple work can be done. So visit your local Family History Center today! Even if you can't get started on your own family history just yet, you can help others do theirs by volunteering to do indexing. Soon, you will feel the Spirit of Elijah working in you!

Family History is Fun!